Life of a New Lagos ''Jobber'' #1 - House Hunt

by - Friday, February 10, 2017


Today is a Friday and I type this on my Techno Camon C8 in one of your ugly yellow buses.

It's not only ugly, it's uncomfortable and I am cranky. Yeah,  disaster. I have lived in Ogun all my life (save for my schooling in Ilorin). Lagos is therefore another state. So, do not say Lagos, when you mean to say Ogun. Stop eet. I rarely come here except for when I have to. And oh well,  I rarely have to.

Now that I have to, guess what, it's going to be a long time visit. It's for a job and let me kind of make this a fanciful thing. Let's begin : I am the new content and correspondence officer of a real estate company. Don't worry if you don't really dig into real estate. We are both on the same level. I am practically a novice. Oh, why I am picked for the job? Ehm, reason is more of my inclination to digital marketing than whatever real estate is.

I will bore you if I continue with that paragraph, so let's move. I am not excited to leave home in the dark to get to work by 8am. It's such a cruel idea that I get home late from work too. So, next good move - get a place to stay for the week and go home on weekend, or not. And guess what, house hunt has been bullshit.

No, it may not be for you. I hear there is money in Lagos. Induction to the system isn't started yet so I guess, I will have to wait a little more to claim my own money. For now, a broke-ass fine babe is behind your screen. My looks don't match my pocket. Nah. Oh wait, I don't mean my outfit. I mean my looks. O boy, I am fine.

Ehm,  I was supposed to talk about house hunt before narcissism took over. Because of my shikini money, I can't find a decent house. So,  I got to this supposed girl's hostel and I was like, no, you kid. I won't tell you, it's too long to narrate but the toilet is a den of microbes. No, I'll pass. Next.

Yeah, next. I don't want. Next, I still don't want. No house, no nothing for now. I will soon alight from your ugly bus. Bye.

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2 comments

  1. Lol. One of my best!

    I totally get you. FOr one bred in Lagos, I cannot stand it for more than three days at a row.

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    Replies
    1. Oh, thank you.

      I am telling you, Lagos is just one place of varieties- stress and enjoyment- all in one package.

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