Long Distance Relationships Fail: Why?

by - Friday, February 26, 2016

Sad woman

Relationships are beautiful, aren’t they? The thought of having a partner to share life with is just so cool.  It is therefore a superb idea to invest in your relationship because the future rewards are immeasurable. Long distance relationships are however more difficult to maintain than short distance relationships. Bridging distance is no small deal guys, not even with the high tariff rates of our network providers in Nigeria. Buying data for Skype, Whatsapp and the likes is also expensive and then, the popular MTN (time to shut my mouth). 

If you are wondering why it is so difficult,  why many long distance relationships fail, you are not alone. You are thinking… distance should make the heart grow fonder... And, well, it is the opposite in your own relationship so you feel frustrated. You probably don’t want to hear this but I must tell you anyway. I must tell you that many long distance relationships fail. In fact, a couple that has been together may eventually break up immediately they are apart. But are these types of relationships bound to fail? Isn’t there something that can be done? Why should any couple be doomed because for some unavoidable reasons, they have to be apart? What if there are some big time mistakes you are currently making and can do well to avoid to not only prolong the relationship but make it exciting? You don’t have to survive it, you can actually enjoy this. Yes you can can!

What if I told you that your long distance relationship is not doomed to fail? Let’s take a look at these three hings you even though are not supposed to be doing are doing?

Lack of complete trust

The issue of trust is not one anyone should be discussing but it seems as if a lot of relationships- both short distance and long distance relationships lack this. Lack of trust puts more strain on a long distance relationship. You have to learn to trust your partner to be able to handle issues on his own; you have to trust in his faithfulness. If for any reason you can’t just bring yourself to trusting a man, you should not be in a relationship with him. It will first of all cause you so much of stress and make the relationship to end anyway. If you however are the one with trust issues, you must work on yourself. This is very important.

Conclusive Assumptions

One time he says he is at a swimming pool and you conclude that he doesn’t like to catch fun with you. The only thing you forgot totally is that you are not together. That your partner isn’t in the same location as you are in doesn’t mean he is not supposed to live like a human being. When something annoying crops up, try to ask questions. Why would he not want to keep the talk date with you instead? You may eventually realize that it skipped his mind. Conclusively assuming every time may cause a long distance relationship to fail.

Delayed forgiveness 

If you ask me, we find it difficult to forgive. Men on the other hand move on pretty quickly. In a long distance relationship, there will be a lot of forgiving. Offenses will come; the frequency of these offenses depends on how both of you decide to make it work. Not forgiving on the spot or within a short time can cause bitterness to accumulate and that in turn can quickly ruin a long distance relationship.

Financial Issues 

Lack of money can cause a strain in long distance relationships. Many of these relationships fail because when there is no money,  romance may be difficult. Communication may be stunted too and even ideas fly off. If one or both of you can sacrifice some amount of money to make sure finances isn't a problem when either of you wants to visit or when you want to call, video chat or text,  it will go a long way to save your relationship. 

If you are going to make your long distance relationship not fail, avoid these three points I raised.

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  1. Hi, Esther.
    I know it's not really what you're writing about, but what would you consider a good reason to end a long distance relationship?

    1. Hiya Gbolahan,

      Yes, I would consider ending a long distance on a good reason, a 'legally' viable reason. But what?

      Do you mind talking specific? You could shoot me an email.

  2. *raises up hand* Question ma. Does the ring eliminate the worry? like if one of the spouses have to work far away?

    With those who believe in 'one true love', will it be different with the one true love or its still gonna be the same?

    Is Long distance sometimes not a test for lasting relationships? cuz, anything worthwhile in life must go through tests...right?