Must -read, Practical Tips on Dating

by - Friday, December 09, 2016

Couple dating

Guest Post by Olufunmbi Purpose

It can be quite difficult to strike a good balance when dating especially for those who are new in the business.

How do you appear interested without coming off as desperate or needy?

How do you get to know someone without being nosy or rude?

And how do you figure out how a person feels about you or tell them how you feel about them without either of you feeling uncomfortable?

Dating is a tricky business, but here are some guidelines that'll keep you successful and in the mix.

1. Define your expectations.

Why are you dating?
What are you looking for?
Do you want a lifetime commitment, or do you want to live completely in the moment?

Whether or not you're seeking a commitment can make a difference in how you approach dating.

If you're dating for fun and companionship, what matters most is how well you get along, right off the bat.

If you're seeking a partner, you should be more willing to overlook the initial shyness and awkwardness so that you can get to know a person over more than one date.

Compatibility and emotional exchange are important here. Most of us are looking for a mixture of fun and commitment, but it's important to know where you stand so that you can figure out if your date is on the same page with you.

2. Decide how you want to date.

In today's modern world, it's not enough to know that you want to date, you have to know how you want to date. Because there are several different ways of going about it, each with their pros and cons. Remember that you don't have to stick to any one style. In fact, trying more than one probably increases your likelihood of success.

Examples of such styles are; Internet/online dating, asking your friends to set you up or going to parties, clubs or bars.

3. Get yourself looking your best.

Maybe you tell yourself that looks don't matter when it comes to love. This is true, but only for love, starting out does not count as love.

While lasting affection and emotional exchange (the backbone of relationships) have nothing to do with looks or grooming, the initial attraction you feel for another person often does.

So always make a good first impression as it goes a long way! Don't forget though, to be yourself, as people do not like superficial dressing, speech or actions. Be your own genuine self, and in the end if your date likes you, you want it to be because he/she likes your personality and appreciates you for you! Not because you happened to put on your makeup well or wore the most flattering outfit. How you take care of your looks says a lot about you.

Guys, You'll want to know what hair to keep and which to style; how to get the clearest skin and when to shave; how to prep your breath in case you end up kissing, etc. Don't underestimate this step!

Ladies, obviously — you'll want to know hair, skin, makeup, accessories, and clothing secrets that will make your date have a picture of you glued to his memory for a lasting while.

4. Be outcome-independent.

In dating, you're going to deal with rejection. In fact, if you're not getting rejected at some point, you're probably not putting yourself out there enough. If you're outcome-independent, meaning you don't care whether you're welcomed or rejected by a potential date, that rejection isn't going to sting.

If rejection doesn't sting, you won't let it keep you from meeting new and interesting people, thereby increasing your chances of success.

Being outcome-independent is a lot easier in theory than in practice. You're going to need to learn how to develop a thick skin in order to really master this. It's worth it though: Too many people let the fear of rejection keep them from getting very far in dating.

I hope these help you to start a healthy dating relationship with someone you'll like.

This is a Guest Post by Olufunmbi Purpose 

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